(and why those pesky patterns persist)

One of the greatest mysteries of our earthly experiences is how those who love us so much as souls hurt us so deeply as people. This is because souls who love us the most will agree to play any role needed for our spiritual evolution, growth, and ultimately, total freedom. Often the roles they play are the the painful catalysts.

Today I’m speaking into one such pattern where someone who loves you lets you down. They may be your partner, colleague, best friend, family member, etc. and something in their behavior leaves you feeling disappointed, betrayed, unsupported or abandoned. And this feeling is familiar to you. You’ve been here before!

Here is one way the energy works: 

  1. You two agree before coming into bodies that you will play certain roles with one another (all manners of villains and heroines).
  2. You do not have conscious memory of this choice, or all of the lifetimes and roles you’ve shared before.
  3. Before you know them, you suffer a core wounding at a time in your life when you had no resource to make sense of it and no ability to process or self-regulate, i.e. when you were a child. The one who originally wounded you was the one who should have provided the love, safety, belonging, affirmation, affection, and they didn’t. 
  4. This core wounding then forms an energy pathway in you. It gets woven into your biology, your cells, your very life. 
  5. From that energy pathway born of experience, core limiting beliefs are formed such as “I’m not lovable, seen, appreciated, understood, worthy,” etc.
  6. Your core limiting beliefs and the residual pain in you then create your current, non-preferred experience with others.

An example: Your parents never supported or affirmed you. You’ve made your way through much healing and expansion, choosing loving and supportive people, supporting yourself, etc. But find that the key people in your life just don’t or won’t support you. They love you. You’ve told them what you need, and they even desire to offer that to you, and yet you are continually let down when it matters most. 

It is essential to realize that this original information (wounding) in you is magnetic, and it is creative. This is why certain patterns persist even when you think you’ve transcended them. You may think you’re clear, that you’re making new choices, laying down new boundaries, living your truth. 

But if this core energy remains in your cells, psyche, and energy, everything in the world picks up on this bright, clear signal that is constantly broadcasting, “This is what is true! I am not supported (loved, seen, valued, etc.)” The universe honors your signal completely, even though you are intending to create the opposite.

Your resulting experience is born of this truth: The world does not prove what you believe to be true. Rather, it is continually showing you what you believe. However, you are interpreting this reflection as proof of your belief, which then gives it greater creative energy in you, meaning you create more of the same experience. It repeats, gaining strength and momentum each time.

So your core energy creates the pattern, and then you and your soul beloved reinforce it. In the case of our example above, if the energy from your core wounding is saying, “I’m not supported,” then the universe will honor your truth completely by giving you experiences that reflect this to you. So yes, that person’s behavior is in fact unsupportive to you. This is part one.

Part two is the proving. Their behavior will lead you to find fault with them. “You don’t support me!” Rarely does someone move directly to, “Everything I’m experiencing is born of what is inside me!” Though I know some of you do. 😉

In this creation path the groove gets deeper and bigger. Since you have found “proof” of your position in their behavior, your belief has self-justified itself again. This is how we end up in persistent, looping patterns.

Energy works like this all the time, with everything. This flow is at the heart of “you create your reality.” People get confused by that a lot, thinking the “you” creating is your mind or even your desires. Rather it’s your ENERGY, every vibration in you through lifetimes of experiences, that is creating through the residual information in your cells and the beliefs it has created.

So even if you choose someone who truly loves you so you won’t feel disappointed, unsupported or abandoned, this energetic law of the universe actually requires that they help you to experience that wounding again and again. They almost don’t have a choice in the matter. They are a character in your well-developed script written from your wounding and karma, and all energy will go that way, obeying your belief. The good news is this energetic law also holds the key to our freedom when we are ready.

Begin with this: Instead of interpreting what is happening as you being treated poorly, what if you are actually being infinitely loved by the universe? How is this so? Because the universe is your friend, and friends tell each other when they are living lies. Your belief (that you are not supported, not loved, not worthy, not seen) is a lie. It’s always been a lie.

Such a pattern likely goes back lifetimes, and here is the hopeful part: This is the lifetime you are poised to free it completely because you are a bigger space of love. A more expanded awareness. More conscious. You have the learning of multiple lifetimes behind you. Your soul mission (contract) is to get fully free from that pattern, that karma, that energy, and you are up for it! You are capable. Equipped. And you’ve got that amazing soul beloved who is here to help you (albeit often unpleasantly!) every step of the way.

That said, a person isn’t ready until they’re ready. “Not ready” is recognized by the “they are the problem” mindset, whether they are you partner, colleague, family member, governing party, religious institution, or anything else. Until you are ready, the problem will always be “out there.” 

“Out there” may be colleagues who don’t value your input. Adult children who don’t honor you. A partner who consistently doesn’t meet the only need you ever express (but will meet you in all other sorts of ways). Financial hardship that just won’t end. A disease that debilitates you. It can be anything. Each and every suffering is born of the pain that was beaten into you, neglected out of you, shamed upon you for eons (as well as the times you neglected, shamed, or visited pain on others, for we have played every part).

That is, until you rise. Until you step up to the plate and take 100% accountability for your experience, no matter what it is. After all, you’ve tried the alternative for ages. We know how that works out…more victimization, disappointment, anger, resentment, depression, and powerlessness. 

Your soul truly is here to become fully empowered and fully free. 

This is my service and devotion, to support those who desire such total freedom and empowerment. Together we solve the problem beyond the vibrational level where it was created through energy and insight, clearing and guiding.

I LOVE this work. Reach out if it’s your time.

All Love,

Christine