Once upon a time there was a little girl. She had golden hair, and her voice was like an angel song. Her laughter was like a babbling brook and her eyes lit up with a playful spark. She lived in a heavenly world of complete freedom of choice. It was called the home Field of Freedom. Whatever she was interested in playing with, she simply thought about it and it showed up. It could be a magical fairy city made of light crystals. It could be trees that were as tall as the earth is deep, where she could float and fly in their canopy, changing from being a soaring bird to a monkey swinging by its tail to a sweet blossom shimmering in the stratospheric breeze. She could feel, be, and experience everything, because she knew she was everything. She was a Godbeam, a Godstream, God incarnate. She was her own particular glorious stream of God, a unique soul signal that radiated out into a magical world of choice and freedom as the beautiful being that she was. And she wasn’t alone. All around her, in her world and in other worlds, were an infinite number of Godbeams doing the same thing – Creating! Thinking universes into being through their divine imaginations. They were all God experiencing itself as an infinite array of diversity, so that it could turn and behold itself from every angle, like light refracting from a billion points, both away from and toward itself. It was a huge party of light that always grew brighter and brighter.
And then one day, some of these infinite, eternal Godbeams got an idea. They became interested in what it would feel like if they didn’t know that they were God. What if they didn’t know that they were exquisite streams of the universal consciousness of the One Source, manifesting and expressing into multi-verses of creation? This was a playful, creative bunch of Godbeams, and they thought it would be really interesting to experience this lack of awareness of the whole.
So in that moment the illusion of separation was born, and wow it was interesting! As they played with their new universe, they birthed an intriguing sense of individuality. An idea took root in their beings that, since they were separate, they were discreet individuals with no connection to one another. This was a brand new experience, and most invigorating! God had never experienced itself as “not itself” before! So this experiment of separation took hold and grew with tremendous energy, because it was so interesting and unlike anything that the Godstreams had ever experienced before. And the Godstreams were all about experience! Every kind. So, many of them dove into this Experiment whole-heartedly. They dove in so far and so deep that as their timelines unfolded, through lifetimes and histories and cultures and peoples that separated and grew ever more distinct from each other, they eventually could no longer remember where the experiment began. They forgot their point of inception. They had become the Experiment so fully they had forgotten that they were inventing it. They forgot that they were infinite source, all facets of God, distinct light beams streaming out from the one Great Light. And they got so far out into that cosmic darkness, that they could no longer remember that they were God. They completely forgot who they were.
And in their forgetting, their strife grew. In their forgetting came suspicion. This Experiment of Separation bred fear, and the fear bred hate and worry and pain. These were new sensations to the Godbeams, and while they weren’t fully comfortable, the sensations were very interesting. So they kept following this stream of creation, farther and farther, until they completely lost sight of their fellow God-streams who lived at home in their Fields of Freedom. They lost sight of everything from whence they came, like stars that were so far out in the night sky you couldn’t see their light. And back in the Fields of Freedom, the other God-streams who weren’t part of the Experiment began to yearn for their brothers and sisters. They missed them, they saw how the Experimenters were hurting and how they couldn’t remember the truth of who they were. So they decided to embark on an adventure of their own.
One of the adventurous ones was the Golden Girl. She loved all of the God-beams with her whole heart (because it was the very heart of God), and she missed playing with them in the Field of Freedom so much that she volunteered to dive into their cosmic darkness with the hope of whispering to their hearts of what they had forgotten. She knew it would be a challenge, but she also knew there were many, many other Godbeams who were aligning to send out the Message of Remembrance to the Experimenters. And the Golden Girl understood the magnitude of the task. The Experimenters had entered into the illusion of Separation so fully that they couldn’t remember it was pretend. They couldn’t remember it was an experiment they were interested in having, so communicating with them would be difficult.
And here was the thing she knew she was up against: As the experimenters had gone further and further into separation where they couldn’t hear the heartbeat of God, they had lost the navigation center of their own hearts. What had taken over as the guiding function of their beings was the control of their minds. And that control had become like an intricate web, snaring all who were participating in the Experiment. The net of the web had a trance-like effect – it made the Experimenters dopey, asleep to the Truth. They simply followed the patterns of control rather than the flow and wisdom of their God-stream knowing, which was always new and vibrant and unexpected. So what became real to them was the Separation, and the Separation always felt like fear. They felt and lived as though fear were real! This fear drowned out the pulse of their God-beam, the energy of Love. And not only that, the program of fear and control took away their freedom to the point that they found themselves continually becoming their environment. It was a bit like a highly contagious virus. If one Experimenter (or worse, a group of them) was angry, then others became the anger. If someone was afraid, that was also spread. And then they thought the fear was their own, instead of just their environment. And they developed mass systems that spread the fear as quickly as possible: millions of screens and signals full of constant reminders of their Separation and the suspicion and pain it bred. It seemed as though all of the glories of the Home Field of Freedom were lost forever.
So the Golden Girl, in her infinite and sweet imagination that immediately turned everything she held in her heart into form, made for herself a school where she could study this thing called Separation. And there she saw that the nature of fear was to control. It was a difficult concept to grasp at first. As a divine being, with everything infinitely available through choice in every moment, it was hard to imagine what there could possibly be to control. If a Godbeam just be’d what it was, it had every option available and there was nothing ever to fear. But she saw that in taking on the Experiment of Separation, the Experimenters had given up real choice. In forgetting that they were God, the only way to go forward was to control. She began to understand. In the world of separation, you could be hurt. You could lose. You could feel unsafe. And it was so real there! So the Experimenters had developed control as a means to feel safe. What a smart idea! It was a way to keep from being hurt, and from dying (which was another thing – they had begun to believe they didn’t go on forever, that dying was real!). So they used control as a means to protect and survive. But the thing was, it never really worked. This was the problem with the illusion of separation. They were using more separation to try and fix it, and as one the smartest Experimenters once said, you can never solve a problem at the level it was created. She saw that if control were to work, the best ones, the ones they called the “control freaks” would be the happiest, safest, most peaceful Experimenters. But they weren’t! Oh my, how they struggled and suffered! She could see that the nature of control was exactly opposite of the nature of being a Godbeam, since divine nature was to flow.
But here was the thing. In order to reach the Experimenters, the only thing to be done was to go into their pretend world of separation and remind them from within that they were a Godstream, a Godbeam, a God-Being through and through. And the only way to go into their world was to also take on the mantle of separation as though it were real. So the Golden Girl and countless other infinitely loving God-streams agreed to come onto the dense playing field of the Experiment of Separation, so that, in that environment, when they remembered who they were, it would remind the Experimenters, and everything could rejoin the flow of divinity and not be stuck in the matrix of control and fear ever again.
So the Golden Girl went. She took on a body, a form. It felt so ridiculously small and confining for the brilliance of her Godbeam stream! And while there she participated in many of the stories that the Experimenters had created. She experienced betrayal from other body-forms, and she was hurt, and she hurt others. She lost Experimenters that she loved and grieved deeply, and she hated those who had hurt those she loved. She tried to fix and control everything, so it would quit hurting so much. You see, she, too had forgotten that she was a Godbeam! She very cleverly used the tools of the Separation web to try to free herself from the web, but the rules of the game are that the game can’t destroy itself. It never invests in its own annihilation. Only the true remembrance of one’s Godself could break the illusion, end the game and release the Godbeams from their Experiment amnesia.
For a time she was completely lost in the Experiment. And then one day, in the fullness of time when all was ready, she began to remember. It began like a tiny spark in her heart, a faint glow that pulsed with love from a faraway source. She began to know that some things she had accepted as real or true just didn’t make sense. Something made her question the ways she was living in this body-form, with fear and separation as the name of the game. She began to hear the hum of her heart over the chatter of her mind. Others around her seemed to have similar sparks of remembrance going on, and they gathered and shared their ideas and their love with one another. And they noticed that all over the planet of Experimentation, a light was beginning to pulse, breathe, expand and grow.
As the light grew brighter, they noticed many of the programs of the experiment (that always ran in their minds rather than their hearts) began to expire. They no longer felt the need to be right, they no longer felt hurt or angry when other Experiementers behaved in certain ways. They began to see every hurt and terror and challenge they’d endured was part of the spark that woke them to the remembrance of who they were! They no longer felt wronged by any of the experimenters (or felt they’d wronged them) because they could see there was no such thing as right or wrong, only the perceived illusion of separation. The grand Experiment! Which meant they could see there was nothing to control! It was like being freed from prison!
Once the program began crumbling, everything made so much sense! And the Golden Girl began to experience a joy like she’d never known, the joy of coming home into the truth of who she was! It was so exquisite, so beautiful, and she realized she might never have known a joy so deep if she hadn’t known fear so great and misery so complete as that of thinking that she was separate from God. This joy was unlike any she had ever known in her home Field of Freedom. It was deeper, stronger, and more glorious. And then she noticed her Godbeam was transformed. She had always been a perfection of light, but now her light was different. It was like Source itself had multiplied its own light a million times over, and her whole being lit up like a thousand suns. The power of her brilliance was beyond comprehension! And she looked around at all of the other beloved God-streams, and saw the same was happening for them. They saw that in their remembrance, not only had they brought the Experimenters who had forgotten back into the flow of their God-stream, they also had created a new heaven. A new heaven! It was a dimension beyond all other dimensions of Love, Light and Creation, something God itself had never experienced before! And their hearts, which were the very hearts of God itself, were exploding in joy. The love was arrayed throughout universes, and many heavens burst into being from nothing. God was exponentially more through this forgetting and remembering, through the losing and finding than it had been in only knowing itself as One. And oh how the Golden Girl’s heart sang! It sang and sang, with a joy that knew no end.
She now knew there was no need to “return” to the home Field of Freedom, because everything had become that. She was that. She was fully free no matter where her Godbeam showed up – in a body-form, in a new heaven, or in any corner of any universe. And all of the Godbeams looked at each other – the Experimenters and the Adventurers – and had a cosmic laugh that echoed through eons and eternities. God was at once separate and whole, all and nothing. And they looked at each other, which was beholding themselves, and knew that all was well and had only ever been well, forever and ever. They breathed in the Field of Freedom that was their own hearts, and knew that it was so. And so it is.
© 2015 Christine Elder
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